If thinking too much can keep me from climaxing I guess it makes sense that I could think myself into it...wait no it doesnt. and what if I have asthma? do I really have to forcibly hyperventilate to climax solo
Check the link below for more details...
look ma, no hands!
think-gasm
Showing posts with label im funny dammit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label im funny dammit. Show all posts
9.16.2010
9.10.2010
chop phuey
I bought a bunch of chopsticks to make myself eat slower (you know because it takes the body 20 minutes to recognize its full...and most food is too good to allow to sit for 21 minutes) but all it did was make me learn how to use chopsticks better
4.16.2009
3.12.2009
i mean really
who was the first person to put a penis in his/her mouth? who thought to themselves..."hmm..i wonder what itd be like to have that in my mouth?" and then actually did it...i mean really
tampon commercials...who wears white and then does gymnastics or goes swimming on their period? if i did that then my white bottoms ended up uhm...not white could i sue the braided string company for false advertisement, pain and suffering and a dry cleaning bill--lets be real a new outfit...mother nature wins...i mean really
tampon commercials...who wears white and then does gymnastics or goes swimming on their period? if i did that then my white bottoms ended up uhm...not white could i sue the braided string company for false advertisement, pain and suffering and a dry cleaning bill--lets be real a new outfit...mother nature wins...i mean really
2.11.2009
disablities
generally disabilities arent funny...
generally
is it bad that everytime i see someone with down syndrome i say "hey i might know him" or "he looks familiar where have seen him before?"
the other day i was walking behind a blind woman, she was walking with a blind person stick...i dont know what theyre called-walking sticks
anyway she was walking kinda zig zaggy and making large swoops with her walking stick. and i thought to myself, "i wonder if they get trained with those" as if it was a skill someone could be born with or something (im a dork...but it doesnt end there)
next i thought- " if i were blind (bc thats the next logical step) i wouldnt swoop my stick as wide, itd be quick and right in front of me kind of like parkinsons" thats was mean but i laughed, anyway i'd probably trip a lot as a result
then as i was passing her i was like i wonder where i should step so she doesnt hit me...man i hope she doesnt hit me
then i saw her (with my mind's eye...whatever the hell that means) swing her walking stick at me and take me out at the knees nancy kerrigan style...even my mind is after me
i laughed out loud....walking down the street...other people might have thought i was crazy..but im funny damn it
generally
is it bad that everytime i see someone with down syndrome i say "hey i might know him" or "he looks familiar where have seen him before?"
the other day i was walking behind a blind woman, she was walking with a blind person stick...i dont know what theyre called-walking sticks
anyway she was walking kinda zig zaggy and making large swoops with her walking stick. and i thought to myself, "i wonder if they get trained with those" as if it was a skill someone could be born with or something (im a dork...but it doesnt end there)
next i thought- " if i were blind (bc thats the next logical step) i wouldnt swoop my stick as wide, itd be quick and right in front of me kind of like parkinsons" thats was mean but i laughed, anyway i'd probably trip a lot as a result
then as i was passing her i was like i wonder where i should step so she doesnt hit me...man i hope she doesnt hit me
then i saw her (with my mind's eye...whatever the hell that means) swing her walking stick at me and take me out at the knees nancy kerrigan style...even my mind is after me
i laughed out loud....walking down the street...other people might have thought i was crazy..but im funny damn it
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