the heart you see

help me see
the heart You see
not the heart i think i have
or wish were within me
but the current heart
the carnal heart
the heart i'd never want the world to see
let me see
reveal to me
in the deepest moments of transparency
show me the heart You see within me.

this masquerade has begun to fool even me
and my perceived anointing
turned to cursed trickery
please show me
the ugly
the nasty
the flesh more than skin deep
it may be the devil but it may just be me

please, please, show me the heart You see
that i can yearn for Yours daily
yearn to serve with Christs humility
LORD, show me the heart You see
so they will no longer see me.

when i grow up...

i want to be famous
i want to be a star
i want to be in movies...

no really.

i want to win a SAG award, i want to go to the olympics for javelin, i want to start a high school for design and construction that certifies adults on the weekends, i want to be in the military, i want to own an orphanage...in america, i want to be the next barbara walters, i want to be in the wnba, i want to live in philly and own a house in new mexico. i want to be successful. i want to be a success. i want to be a good example. i want to be. i want to be the person you think i am...
i want to be whatever i need to be to glorify His name properly